Even though, I went to college for a year, my life was never getting a better statues about how it was going forward. After college, I ended up nowhere to go because of the love story - the love story is back and started drama. I hate to say this but its being honest, I really fall in love and did my best to fight for it but it never get nowhere but yes, the pain started from there. Lost the first love of my life (grandma) my mother who raised me since a baby than lost the second love of my life (who I thought she was my soulmate but I was wrong).
So, the pain started to haunt me because of what? the love of your mother? or the love of your ex-girlfriend? But still don't know the answer WHY I DO FEEL PAIN ABOUT THE PAST? the answer is hiding somewhere, I will get it for you.
After 4 to 5 years later, I finally found my soulmate, my true love, my everything and who can also give me both love I was looking for. I dated her almost for two years and then we got married and now we are happy couple that lives their own place. I love her always and forever. She changed me, and everything else about me. Actually, my entire world.
Finally, I get back to WHY DO I FEEL PAIN ABOUT THE PAST? Someone said "Dream a better dream" I don't remember who I heard from but it's true and I believe it. The reason why I feel pain about the past is because I'm missing my mother (grandma), When I gave a thought of everything, where I'm now from the past, how my life changed, and the present of my life, all of that seem nothing with my mother (grandman). But thanks to Allah, I'm thankful for everything she done for me, for raising me up, for making me the person I am today. I thank you her more than ever, I love you mother so very much (grandma).